Of Resolutions

It's Chinese New Year and I realize I haven't really done any resolution making. I was kinda busy over the New Year and I never bothered to think properly about some really important stuff.

Well, I suppose this CNY hols I better be honest and write down some important stuff.

So this will be my resolution list:

1) Sign up for that PPE exam. I've had everything ready since last year but I've been putting it off because I've been being an idiot. It's not a difficult thing to do. Just drop the thing at the BCA and start meeting with my supervisors every 3 months. Argh, so hard to do meh? But me, and my fickle-minded indecisiveness will kill me one day.

2) Be more decisive. Sometimes, I believe I am very decisive. And then I realize that I'm not really. I really don't know what to be. Should I be decisive? Arghh.

3) Join a marathon. Even 10km one will do. Just go and run okay!

4) Go on a holiday. All my leave doesn't have to be spent on going home!! I need a real break sometimes. I love home, and I love my family, but this Singapore Working Environment requires a Real Break where I can hang around somewhere noone knows me and I get to put a hat over my head and collapse on a beach. Ok, I can't do that on a mission trip...but God knows it'll be better than the Singapore Working Environment. I bet they have R&R too.

5) Mission Trip. (May be Combined with Resolution No.4) I have no idea where. The Philippines was once an option. Actually it still is, but I want to try a new place. Vietnam, Cambodia, Myanmar, Indonesia? Shanghai? I'm not sure yet. The missions team at church has yet to come up with their list. I await it with an open mind. If not, I'm considering going to India with my friend's church team. Always wanted to do India, anyway.

6) Figure out this relationship thing. It's very confusing and I'm not sure half the time what is going on. Why are boys so confusing? What on earth do they want? What are they thinking? What did they think they were doing? What is the point? Why don't they tell us what they are thinking? Why just do and not say! Argggh. Anyway, I do believe that I'm not going to be single. I think I want to adopt alot of kids. Anyway, it certainly takes alot of providence to find someone to fall in love with, and who falls in love with you too. So I suppose I'm going to tack on some trust on that. And God, of course, our greatest matchmaker.

7) Pick up guitar. Dad wants me to. He wants one of his kids to play guitar, and since I'm the manliest of his girls he spent CNY trying to teach me guitar. I think I'm hopeless, but one should be nice to one's dads. My little bro is a pianist and the other bro prefers to knock computers about and swipe his ipad. So I think I'll spend sat mornings learning guitar then. I think there are classes held in church.

8) Volunteer. Alright. I've been thinking of doing this for ages. Ever since I gave up tuition on Saturday mornings I am seeking to do something about it. I can't learn guitar and volunteer at the same time. So which one comes first? And can I handle so many things? I also need to keep house and do laundry and  sweep and mop the floor and bake. I always like to fill up my time with so many things I hardly have time to breathe. Then I drop everything and realize I have too much time to breathe and then I get sick. So stupid. So volunteer or guitar? I dunno. Anyway, I want to do something with Autistic kids or Down Syndrome etc. Maybe just troubled kids. I can't really handle old people...but then that's just how I feel. I am going to pray God open some door nearby so I can helps some group of people.

*side note: I realize alot of people pray about something they have already thought about. I tend to pray things like: Hello God I don't know what to do please open the door and I'll walk through it. I suppose this is a side effect of my indecisiveness.
*Ok I have sent out a ton of volunteer forms. I'm not even sure where I have applied now.

9) This is the I Think I Can't Do It But I Must Resolve To kind of resolution. I have realized one thing about myself: I am a horrible person when people are horrible to me. Heh. It takes character to be a nice person when people are horrible to me. So, I need to develop a character that is sweet and kind and honorable even when treated in a most disgraceful manner (Or So I Think).

There really should be a 10 but I'm poofed and need to prepare dinner.

Tata. I've done my duty for this year. Pray I'll be able to keep it.

10) I have suddenly learned about this thing called discipling. I need to find one person to disciple this year. It has suddenly become an Important Thing. I shall look among the younger girls at church and learn to share my life with her. I have some idea who already but I shall pray about it so that I will know if it is God's will or not, or just some silly notion I have in my head.

Fear of Death

2 Corinthians 4

Therefore, since God in His mercy has given us this new way, we never give up. We reject all shameful deeds and underhanded methods. We don't try to trick anyone or distort the word of God. We tell the truth before God, and all who are honest know this. If the Good News we preach is hidden behind a veil, it is hidden only from people who are perishing.

Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of those who don't believe. They are unable to see the glorious light of the Good News. They don't understand this message about the glory of Christ, who is the exact likeness of God. You see, we don't go around preaching about ourselves. We preach that Jesus Christ is Lord, and we ourselves your servants for Jesus' sake.

For God, who said, "Let there be light in the darkness,"has made this light shine in our hearts so that we could know the glory of God that is seen in the face of Jesus Christ.

We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.

We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.

Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies. 

Yes, we live in constant danger of death because we serve Jesus, so that the life of Jesus will be evident in our dying bodies. So we live in the face of death, but this has resulted in eternal life for you. But we continue to preach because we have the same kind of faith the psalmist had when he said, "I believed in God, so I spoke." We know that God, who raised the Lord Jesus, will also raise us with Jesus and present us to himself together with you.

All of this is for your benefit. And as God's grace reaches more and more people, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory. That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won't last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever!

So we don't look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.